Golf Blog

FedEx Cup Predictions

For years, the PGA Tour and players alike have conceded that the FedEx Cup and the season ending playoffs are not perfect.  However, it is an honest attempt to make the end of the season compelling and interesting.  Here are my projections for the 2017 version.

  • Jason Dufner will not win the FedEx Cup.  With 50 billion to 1 odds, don't empty your bank account banking on Duf man going from #30 to #1.  If you decide to bet anyways, here are Dufner's 9 simple check marks to victory.
    • Jordan Spieth must finish 29th or worse
    • Justin Thomas must finish in a 3-way tie for 6th or worse
    • Dustin Johnson must finish T4 or worse and wear blue shoes
    • Marc Leishman must finish T3 or worse
    • No more than 32% of the field can birdie the 3rd hole
    • Jon Ram must finish in a 3-way tie for second or worse
    • Rickie Fowler must finish T2 or worse
    • Pat Perez must not have bacon for breakfast
    • Jason Dufner must win the Tour Championship
  • "How does the FedEx Cup points thing work?"  will set a new record for number of times googled.
  • The Golf Club at East Lake was an amusement park in the 1890's. Tony Finau will make East Lake his own personal amusement park in 2017 and cruise to a 4 shot Tour Championship victory.
  • With 24th ranked Finau pulling out the Tour Championship victory, 176 individual alternate victory scenarios will emerge for the FedEx Cup.
  • The top 5 (Spieth, DJ, JT, Leishman, and Rahm) will all finish outside of the top 5 for for the Tour Championship, putting their chances of FedEx Cup victory into question and plunging the tournament into chaos.
  • Math difficulties and confusion will overtake the scoring booth.  
Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... Mass hysteria!!
— Bill Murray - Ghostbusters

 

  • The following flowcharts will serve as the scoreboard during the entire back nine.
Brooks Koepka!?!?!

Brooks Koepka!?!?!

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  • World renowned astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson will be called in to provide live scoring projections and updates.
  • Neil crushes the call and kills it in the scoring booth.
Neil Calls the live FedEx Cup action.

Neil Calls the live FedEx Cup action.

In 5-billion yrs the Sun will expand & engulf our orbit as the charred ember that was once Earth vaporizes.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson on Spieth's birdie attempt on the 17th hole

 

  • With Rickie Fowler facing a 5 footer to finish in a 3 way tie for fourth place, Webb Simpson eagerly looks on.  Webb is not sure if a two way tie or 3 way tie from Rickie coupled with his 3rd place finish will be good enough for a first place finish.  If Fowler 3 putts and finishes in solo 5th, would he need a bogie from DJ on 18, or would the 3 way tie from Hoffman give him 2nd place??
  • After holing his put for a fourth place finish, Rickie reluctantly fist pumps.  Did he just win $10M or did he just win $1.5M.  Nobody knows!! The excitement and tension is unbearable.
  • On his way to the airport, Justin Rose receives a call from tournament organizers letting him know that he has indeed won the 2017 FedEx Cup!!
  • The bad news for Justin Rose is that he will get stuck in traffic as he turns his car around and heads back for the trophy presentation.
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